I love music.
I hate how it captures the totality of a moment (forever)
the depth, the smell, the feel.
More so the terrible than the great.
Four minutes become a deceptively ruinous echo
Prying open old chests
Blowing the dust of times past into your nostrils
Suffocating you on a phantom pain that you can only recall
It hurts to remember how much a time hurt,
And that the burden of the pain has already passed.
So you are left with an unbearable lightness
Tortured to tearlessness.
I love music.
When words are but a trickle
of the forceful river upstream
dammed by thoughts
damned by the fear
of unleashing the raw power of uncensored emotions.
“I need you; your existence is the reason I start each day”
seeps out as a safe and unassuming “hey”.
“I hate you so much for ruining my life”
becomes a quiet but poisonous “bye”.
I wanted the old things, afraid of the new.
Lost in a smoky haze of sleepy days
Volcanic nights became our ways
Burning you into my skin: another tattoo.
They said love lasts forever.
Maybe it wasn’t love.
Maybe that was the length of our forever.
Oh silly heart!
wanting things you can’t have
hoping for things you don’t need
loving the one soul you shouldn’t
hopelessly waiting to be freed
When it hurts to be numb
Twisting the knife in your own back
Is all you can do to feel something.
Then you float on the high
Of knowing that you are still human
And you once knew the opposite of pain.
The absence of what was not
Is greater than the destruction of what was.
Memories of dreams of fantasies
Corrupted by reality’s untruths
Now drift down into the abyss.
the more people you lose
the more of your self you regain.
the less people you love
the deeper you feel the pain.
the Universe shows up
and holds your hand home.
your soul will be free again
for another’s heart to roam.
I once fell in love with a human bean
Who got planted and grew in my soul.
My veins are now the roots and branches
Of a tree in no rush to grow old.